Everyone duck and cover.....here comes the massive outpouring of everything on my mind lately......  Prepare from random, scattered thoughts.....

 

My blog. I wish I had more time for it, like I used to. Is it that I'm busier? My kids are busier? I don't know why I can't keep up like this time last year. Even more so, I wish I would take the time to write more compelling entries that have nothing to do with the day's events. I promise I read everyone's comments and appreciate them so much. And, I do read your blogs too and enjoy them so much! I just don't have a lot of time to comment, but I'll get around to it eventually and update my links....promise.

 

House of horrors. This is my house lately. My cleaning gal was sick last week and couldn't make it, much to my dismay. Yes people, I can mop my own floors and scrub my own toilets--but I don't want to. It takes away from American Idol viewing and wine consumption. Anyway, the general mess has been compounded with mess from a party on Saturday (almost a case of wine downed on a 2-year-old's birthday...are we sick or what?) and the mess of boxes, wrapping paper, etc. from two birthday's worth of presents....make that three. My oldest's friend party, her party at home, and the youngest's actual birthday celebration, and then her friend party. Man, do we party or what? A space-themed cake and an Elmo cake later, I'm over it. So is my credit card.

 

However. Should she keep her solemn vow, my cleaning gal is there right now making everything shiny and filled with the lucious scent of Pine Sol. (Please, God, please let me be greeted my the scent of Pine Sol and fresh laundry).

 

Laundry. No, she doesn't do laundry but I wish she did. She does that sheets, which is good enough for me! First of all, I've never been able to fold the fitted sheet. I just can't do it! I have tried but it always winds up in one big, wrinkled wad. My grandmother always irons her linens. And, if they haven't been used in awhile, she'll take them out, wash them, and iron them again so they'll be fresh. I clearly didn't get that gene. This is obvious when you walk into my bedroom. Awaiting me is about six loads of laundry. If I stuff the washer, maybe 4. Getting it in the washer and dryer is one thing--folding it is another. Then getting it to all of the right drawers. The thought of it overwhelms me. By the time I get home, fix dinner for everyone, and get the girls bathed and in bed......I want to fall into bed myself, not fold socks.

 

Cool retail stores. I am not a big Harold's shopper. It's a little too conservative for my taste. However, this is the time for their annual blowout where everything is marked about 75 percent off. I went through their last week and picked up about $700 worth of clothes for $119. There was a black corduroy skirt I loved so much, I decided to go back and get it in other colors, primarily brown. I mean, for $19.....it's a no-brainer. They had the green one, so I nabbed it. But, they didn't have the brown in my size. For a mere $5, the girl located it and had it shipped to my door within two days. How cool is that? So on Sunday, my daughters and I ran in the mall to return some boots for my youngest. Her feet are just too chubby for high-fashion. Anyway, I suddenly remembered the GREAT pair of pants I got at my favorite store EVER, Anthropologie, back in December. The cute ones from NYE. Where the hell are those, I wondered. After the kids went to bed that night, I destroyed my closet looking for them. Nowhere. Went through the drawers. Nope. Scanned hubby's side in case they accidentally got stuck. No luck. However, I did find the pair of pants I "lost" about a year ago and re-bought. Dammit. I figure my dry cleaner somehow gave them to the wrong person or they are just "lost." Maybe they went where all of the missing single socks go. These pants were a steal -- $128 pants for $29. I couldn't quit thinking about them so on my way to work the next day, I popped in to an Anthropologie that's right by my office. They actually had several pair on the rack, same price. But not my size. However, they DID have my size in the same khaki style. I grabbed it and told my tale of woe to the sales girl. No problem, she says. She does a statewide search on a little scanner machine and finds the right pair in San Antonio. They arrived on my doorstep the next day...for free. Like I said, two cool stores. How much you want to bet I find the old pants this weekend?

 

Weight. I am doing great, if I say so myself. If my math is right, I think I've lost 7 pounds since I started this thing about three weeks ago. I can definitely tell in the way my pants fit, and also...lol...my bra! I've had a few comments about losing weight, and that keeps me motivated. It's really not even hard. I just make healthy food that I like and I don't starve myself or "save up" for a big meal. It makes sense that your body will hold onto that b/c it's "starving." Almonds are my friend. Oh, and avocados. Here is a dish that sounds gross but is really quite good and good for you...... Tuna in water, one hard-boiled egg, half of an avocado. Mix it all together. The tuna acts like the mayonaise in a way and you get the protein from the egg and tuna. It's very low cal/low fat. I've had it about 20 or so times in 3 weeks. We have our fruit and whey proten smoothies every morning.....I think those help with hunger. Outside of my one diet coke a day, I'd say I'm doing fairly well. We allow ourselves one cheat day on the weekends for wine and good food, and that's always fun to look forward to. However, the food we've been eating is good--wraps, fish, veggies, brown rice, chicken.....it's not bad. Essentially, white carbs are outta here. It works.

 

American Idol. This used to be my favorite show. I still like it but I think they are purposefully putting through too many bad singers just for television's sake. I understand the ratings thing, but it seemed like in the past they had a good mix of silly/bad and good. I sure hope we get rewarded in Hollywood with talent we haven't seen yet. Also, Paula is scaring me this year......and Simon seems bored with the whole thing. I wonder when America will get bored? Speaking of t.v. shows, I'm still watching Desperate Housewives and digging it. It's good this season. I was almost out on this one, but they've sucked me back in. I've tried to get into that You're the One That I Want show about Grease but it is so bad that I just have to flip the channel. It's also obvious to me that Olivia Newton John was really the only person meant for those black spandex pants in the last scene.....nuff said.

 

Bailey's. Why is this so expensive? I don't get it. $27 for a small bottle that gives you maybe 5 drinks....maybe. It's so not on my diet but I had some this weekend for cheat day. If I got really drunk from it, it might be worth it but mostly it just tastes like really expensive dessert.

 

Parent/teacher conference. Had the second one today. Turns out my daughter, who is half-way through Kindergarten, is reading where most first-graders read toward the end of their first grade year. A score she received on math concepts is way above average..... Excellent is 21 and she scored 57. The teacher said she has primarily mastered all of the Kindergarten level skills already. Sure, there's more to learn, but she's on her way. I know she is smart, but it's nice to know that it's just not me being a proud mama. We are still having emotional drama with her, but the teacher feels like she is still in a "grieving" process from being separated from her best friend and not being able to find a similarly close friendship. She isn't mature enough, yet, to learn how to go out and make friends and play "their way." She always wants everyone to play "her way." Public school -- check.....School of Hard Knocks -- needs improvement.

 

I made my two year old look like an 80s thug. My little girl has curly hair -- it's precious. I don't know where she got the curls, but I don't care. Her hair is just so darn cute! I've never really done the "bangs thing" with my kids. I always just let their hair grow and push it to the side with something cute. Well, the little one doesn't like cute. In fact, she rips "cute" out of her head so hard it pulls her hair out. No bows for this girl. After months of having hair hang down in her eyes, get in her food, and bother her I decided to get a small bang trim for her....a small one. Well, she screamed. She hit. She pushed the scissors away. She calmed down just enough for the lady to snip away at it......Her bangs are so.....well....bangs.....straight across. However, we left the longer, curly portions alone. Yep, she has a mullet. Maybe if I can find one of those retro 80s hard rock t's for kids I could just pull it off like I'm a cool mom with a hip kid. Or not.

 

Remember that to-do list I'm always talking about? Well, it's still not finished. I STILL need to put photos in albums and update frames. I STILL need to write my kids' annual birthday letters. I STILL need to update their baby books. I need to get our video tapes transferred to DVDs. I need to put all of the old pics of my grandparents in my antique table thingy like I planned on months ago. I need to organize my junk drawers. I need to figure out if I want to put some sort of fabric shower curtain over the ugly half shower in the powder bath we just updated. I need to paint the cabinet in that bathroom. I need to pick a color. I need to get my daughter an Amelia Bedelia book. I need to take a load of outgrown baby clothes to Goodwill. I need to put up the tent in my youngest daughter's room and make it more of a "big girl room." I need to help my oldest prepare and learn how to work the gadzillion electronical toys she got for her birthday...and Christmas. They just sit there. I need to organize our home videos and get them all safe and in one place. I need to figure out of this new lawn guy is going to help us out or not. I need to convince hubby that we need our kitchen cabinets stained sooner rather than later. I need to file household paperwork--it's a fire hazard. I need to organize my closet. I need to find a belt.

 

Not just any belt. I am going to see Willie, my boyfriend, next weekend. Rumor is Jessica Simpson will perform, too. I really could stand to have a word or two with her about her severe lack of judgment. Anyway, I have this kick ass outfit in mind for the event. I am going to wear my way-cool skirt from LA, tall black boots, vintage Willie Nelson t-shirt with a long-sleeve shirt underneath.....and a belt. I have the belt in mind, but I can't find it. It's part hard-rock/part country/part flashy and fun. The outfit won't work without it.

 

Why don't people get it right? I called pest control (who should be calling me, their customer) because they haven't been to my house in ages. We scheduled an appt for early today. I yelled at them b/c they don't offer after 5 and weekend appts. They didn't show up. They said it was on Thursday. No it wasn't. So hubby gets on the phone, speaks sternly, and all of the sudden they'll be here Saturday morning. My handyman guy installed the new smoke alarms/carbon monoxide detectors in the wrong place. People RSVP yes to a party; I buy enough party favors and make sure the cake is large enough to accommodate everyone. They don't show up, and they don't explain why. Rude.

 

Sad news. My sweet grandaddy was put in the hospital last week for what seemed to be a digestive issue. It's the second time in two months he went in for it. This time, they found a huge mass. Cancer. Malignant. He's 87. He's had a long, great life but I hate that it will end with the dreaded C word. He is the neatest man - a war hero and just a hero in general. Definitely my hero.

 

OK, enough rambling for now........Probably time I write something that I actually get paid for.

 

Til next time.....

 

 

100,000-plus!

 

Woo hoo!

 

OK, where's my trophy?!

 

Hello? Anyone? Bueler?

 

More later..... deadline looms.

 

j

So tired. Need to write, but can't.

 

Just paid bills. Feel poor.

 

One story turned in today, another one to go. Should be turned in tomorrow, but that's a stretch at this point.

 

I say yes way too often. I need to stop doing that.

 

I don't like my hair cut, but I do like my color. Now I have a dilemma. If I go back to my regular guy for a cut, the girl who does the color will wonder why I'm not seeing her at the same time, and it will be obvious I've darkened my hair. Using two salons is a hassle. However, in the name of good hair, it might come to that.

 

The powder bath sink arrives tomorrow. I have no time to get a faucet, mirror, and light that are worth a damn. So, damn. Ran through home improvement store on the way home. Everything I liked was special order, i.e., expensive. Damn again. Also, very few companies make the style of shower knobs we have so it's going to be hard (i.e., expensive) to match the shower hardware to the new sink hardware. Yep, damn again.

 

Party City opens at 9:30. My daughter's birthday is at 10 a.m. It's a 20 or so minute drive to the party location. Those damn balloons better be ready when I get there because I'll have to fly to get to the place in time. Party City should open at 8 on Saturdays, just for crazy moms who have a million things to do prior to their kid's birthday party.

 

I sort of cheated on my diet today. I heard that spelt crackers are OK for a healthy diet -- like in the place of bread or for a snack. Turns out, I really like spelt crackers. I ate more than I was supposed to. And I feel guilty. How weird is that? It's not like I downed a pint of Ben and Jerry's.

 

No sitter for the best night of the year. I get to see Willie Nelson in less than a month, up close and personal. My first sitter cancelled. I have a voicemail in to my next choice -- but no call back so far. I can't miss Willie.....I just can't. Move 'get sitter' up to top of priority list.

 

List......why is it that just when I near finishing one, I think of a million items for another? That's where I am right now, especially with both of my kids' parties on the same day. I figure if I start drinking heavily on Thursday, I'll be nice and chipper on Saturday.......

 

Why is it that I have the energy to write this blog, but not my story that is due tomorrow?

 

It's officially tomorrow in 17 minutes. Somehow, I don't think I'll finish my story in 17 minutes.

 

But I will finish this entry....now.

 

Oh, and less than 100 hits to go til I reach 100,000 hits. Are there any sort of greeting cards congratulating blog dorks on being, well, a blog dork? A certificate from MSN maybe? A tiny purple participation ribbon? A gimme pen or cap? Maybe an awards ceremony at the end of the year where those who reach a certain number of hits get a special commemorative gold pin? I'm sure something like that is in the works......

 

Goodnight.

OK, so if 600 more people hit my page.....I'll be at 100,000 hits on this blog. (Ahem, thank you smalls..... and Kellie Raspberry.....)

 

Next though -- BH, where the hell are you?!

 

And sorry........I haven't been blogging much lately...... SO busy. Both kids' birthdays are this month and I'm on deadline at work. Everything is due by Tuesday, and I'm horribly behind.....

 

Once I'm over the hump, I'll be back. Well, unless I start to procrastinate, and that's highly likely.

 

Had date night last night -- very fun -- highly recommend Alpha Dog. It's awesome.

 

OK, gotta tackle the to-do list before the insanity of Monday morning hits..... but it's sunny outside for the first time in over a week so that's a good thing. AND I'm losing weight and loving it. Another good thing. AND I got a new pedestal sink/vanity for my powder bath! Woo hoo! Does life get ANY better than this?! (sarcasm for those who aren't sure....)

 

Let's go! 100,000..... Maybe I'll just visit my own page 600 times today or I can just type this:

 

Kelly Raspberry's Divorce.

 

xo

j

I think I should give up my day job. I am a poor communicator, it seems, when it comes to the written word.

 

What I meant to say didn't really come across, I guess. Either that, or every single person who commented on it interpreted it differently. Oh well.

 

Let's talk about something different.....

 

Tuna fish - it stinks.

 

Ice storms - Yeah right....they last for about half a second in Texas, yet everyone acts like we're going to be iced and snowed in for days.

 

Hair - I can't wait for Friday....hair cut and highlight. Yes!

 

Fish. I have to eat more of it on this diet. I can barely get it down, but I'll try.

 

Diet. There have been a few cheats......I had a glass of wine on Friday. Hey, I was at the movies. What's better than a flick and a glass of vino? Oh that would be movie popcorn! I had about a handful. And what's better than that?! Mexican food! I had a little bit of it on Saturday night. Yum. And I'll be cheating on Friday, too, at Alleycat's house. BUT, every other single thing I have taken in is totally on the approved list. I am actually starting to cut back on the DC..... I'll pop open a can and get about half way through it. I think I've lost a few pounds; I can just tell.

 

Cashola. Our financial guru/advisor is coming over tonight to talk dollars. We are upping the girls' college funds, and we need to talk about a few other things. Hubby is set on retiring at 55....well for him, anyway. And usually, when he is that determined, he makes it happen. I foresee a lot of "would be nice but it's going to savings" this year, which is smart. Last night we discuss the home improvements for the year and we both agreed on what we want and the price we'll spend. It's kind of nice going into it like that. Guess we need to dust off the contractor's number.

 

The bitch. For anyone who has read long enough, I think after a paint job and seat repair, the bitch will move out of my garage and go to a new owner. I won't be excited until I hear the engine turn, but it looks like it's going to happen. Good riddance.

 

Work. I have a story due. Again, I am procrastinating.

 

Errands. I have errands to run. It's too cold. I have the heater on and am wearing socks and shoes, but my feet are freezing! Geez!

 

Mail. I have so much stuff that is supposed to be arriving this week that I need for upcoming birthdays. This holiday throws a bit of a glitch in that. Oh well, it'll get here when it gets here, right?

 

Trip. Due to the smashing success of our Napa trip, looks like I'll be accompanying hubby and some of his co-workers and their wives on a trip to Santa Barbara for some wine tasting, etc.....starting out in San Diego. Now, there's something to look forward to!

 

Yard. Old yard guy is outta here; new yard guy fired. I think I'm going to really like my yard and seasonal color come spring.

 

Swimming. After a tearful heart to heart with my oldest, turns out, she does not like her current swim school. She says it goes to fast and she has lots of questions "nobody cares about." That's probably her turning the drama on full blast, but I also know it's detrimental to push her into something she doesn't like. So I hired a swim teacher for her -- one on one. She's going to have an intense 10-day session in late May/early June, as is her little sister. This lady swears to me the oldest will be swimming fairly well at that point, and then she'll move on to weekly lessons throughout the summer. Supposedly, this will also kick start the little one, too. The prices are the same, if not less. The only catch is that even though she'll come to our pool, it's a little more expensive, and she has her own heated pool which she prefers to teach in. So, here we go.....another activity. And that's AFTER I added theatre to the oldest's list of things to do. And I STILL don't know where the hell she's going to go this summer for care. Cripes.

 

Two. My baby turns two on Thursday. Little Liv. Seems like a week ago I was writing about her turning one. Time really does fly. Man, is she a wild one! I'm sort of scared of 2, but she sure is a lot of fun.

 

OK, enough procrastinating. Time to get words I get paid for on the screen for a change.

 

Til next time.......

Recently on one of many long commutes home from work, I was listening to talk radio when the topic of marriage came up. The DJs were talking about a survey of women in America regarding the satisfaction of their marriage. In that I can't even remember where I put my jewelry before I go to bed at night, I certainly can't remember the exact details and results of the survey. But what I do remember saddened me, hit home in a way, and also gave me a sense of hopelessness for "happily ever after."

 

Essentially the majority of married women in America say they would prefer to "stick it out" in a marriage, even if they are not happy....even if they know their spouse isn't happy. They would put up with cheating, lying, etc. in order for things to remain status quo and conflict-free. As it turns out, all of these women called in and said that they spend a lot of time daydreaming about what it would like to be single again. However, their maturity and practicality prevent them from packing their bags and calling a lawyer. Instead, they stay and face reality. Little to no sex is fine with them--they don't have the love and passion anymore that makes them want to have sex. And, when it has to happen--and it does when you live with a man--they try to put themselves "out of their bodies" and think of something....anything....else. I guess that's probably the way hookers handle it. Sad.

 

The DJ goes on to say that if "he ain't getting it at home, then he's getting it somewhere else." The majority answer? "Well as long as I don't know, I don't care." These women will throw more energy and attention into dinner parties, coordinating their daughters' outfits, volunteering, and rearranging furniture than they do their own marriage. The women who work--they're the ones who stay long past 5 o'clock. The thought of going home is just too much to bear sometimes.

 

To sum it up, having the "dream"--or at least the appearance of the dream--is worth putting up with just about anything. The dream, you see, is the house, the cars, the kids, the dog, the money, the vacations, the "stuff." Even the sheer thought of the effort, heartache, tears, pain, and time the divorce brings is just too much....not to mention the money it takes to divorce. Why have two poor, lonely adults out there with hurt children when you can have a financially stable couple, kids in place, and at least some knowledge that you'll have a companion to grow old with? When you stay married, you don't have to "share" the kids. Maybe the two of you will look at each other with sheer disgust across the Christmas dinner table, but at least no one is sitting alone on Christmas, wishing they were with their kids. No one has to downsize into an apartment or run-down duplex because the other one got the house. Everything stays as is, happy or not. In a way, easy trumps happy.

 

Also, if you divorce, you have to split up your friends. Sure, everyone will say that they'll remain friends and confidants to both of you. Months down the road, it's clear which party they've chosen. So to divorce, you not only lose your spouse, full-time rights to your children, your home, and your belongings, you also lose your social circle. Damn, you might even lose the family pet. Who knows what will happen in court or at the mediation table? It's a toss up on who gets what, and no one ever feels like it was a fair division. Even the nest egg the two of you have been building together through the years will be split, leaving you both far behind in retirement savings.

 

These are all thoughts that have run through my head before, and even now. See, I come from a divorced home, and honestly, I am happy about that. The alternative scares the hell out of me. And, I've been divorced. We didn't have kids, but I know the emotional toll divorce can bring. I had to divorce his family and our friends, too, and that was sad. I almost got divorced in my current marriage and fear of the unknown brought me back. When I look at my youngest daughter who wasn't born at that time, I'm glad I made that decision. She wouldn't be here if I left. However, I can also understand the concept of being lonely, misunderstood, and hopeless in a "good" marriage. There's that word--marriage. It seems like such an adventure and so romantic when you're planning the flowers and what the bridesmaids will wear. Then down the road, when you're fighting over something as ridiculous as who does laundry more to the point where you aren't even speaking anymore, then you realize just how much you should have been concentrating on the evaluation of your relationship, rather than hue of a dress.

 

Sometimes, when marriage is at its hardest and a spouse is at his or her meanest, the first thought is, "I don't have to live like this." Then you face reality yet again. You take inventory of your furniture, your assets, and imagine just for one tiny second what it would be like to not have your kids on Christmas Day....and you immediately pull back. You'll put up with numb and emotionless sex, pecks on the cheeks or lips (French kissing is too personal), numerous nights out with the guys/girls, selfishness, separate televisions, intense bickering, hurt feelings, missed birthdays and Valentines days, thoughtessness, insensitivity, and the overall knowledge that he/she just doesn't really know who you are and doesn't really "love and cherish you" like he/she said they would however many years ago. Cherish is a big word -- maybe even bigger than love when it comes to marriage. You can love your spouse, but cherishing him or her is an action. It's something you do that he or she feels. I dare say you don't really have a marriage without it. You have a spouse. There's a difference.

 

So back the survey......Apparently, divorce has been on the decline since it peaked in the 1970s. I'd like to say it's because couples have become smarter about marriage and what it takes, waiting longer and not repeating the mistakes of their parents and friends who have divorced. But because the majority of married women say "If I had to do it all over again, I would not marry my current spouse" and that the majority marked "unsatisfied" in their marriage both physically and emotionally, my guess is that it's the lifestyle that is keeping couples together. Better to have money to burn, decent credit, a retirement waiting for you, and that yearly vacation to the Carribean than to turn into single moms and dads who are struggling to keep it together, both financially and emotionally. Better to argue over trivial things like laundry, dishes, bills, and weekly schedules than to swim in the uncertain waters of dating again. Then you look at your kids and realize they are in a seemingly happy, stable home with a mom and dad....and you decide any amount of suffering is worth it. You'll sacrifice happily ever after for them. And then you make a promise to yourself to avoid looking far into the future, the days when your kids are grown and gone.....it's too sad and uncertain. You'll be too old and grey to find anyone new, and sometimes, less-than-ideal companionship is a much better option than living the latter part life alone. And then you think of those before you....grandparents and great-grandparents who were married 50, 60, even 70 years. There is no way they were happy 100 percent of the time. There's no way they didn't fight or feel like they were getting the short end of the stick on more than one ocassion. Can you even imagine the number of times they must have bitten their tongue and turned the other cheek, just to keep the peace? And yet, they are together and glad about it. They made it.

 

Through it all, they stayed together. Whether it was for stability or love...well, only they know that for certain.

 

I'd like to think it's love. So maybe the key is sticking it out and realizing, when it's all said and done, that you said "I do" for a very good reason. It's only that you forgot exactly why just for a bit during the hectic, middle part of the journey that it is marriage. If the saying is true that good things come to those who wait, then I hope the women in the survey and those not surveyed, but who feel the same way, will be glad about their decision in the end, and have no regrets about a love not found and a life not lived to its fullest potential. I hope they can say for certain that it was "happily ever after."

 

I hope so anyway, for everyone who is sticking it out, including myself.

 

So to those out there happily married, not-so-happily married but hopeful, and those who have decided to go it alone and give love another shot......."cheers" and abundant hope to us all........

 

OK, I’ll admit it. It's Day 5, and I’m hungry. Not starving, but just a general feeling of hungry that doesn't go away. I can’t get macaroni and cheese off of my mind. Yep, that’s what’s On My Mind today – carbs.

However, it’s not enough “pain” to quit, although I lost hubby yesterday. He caved around 4 p.m. and had a gyro. And he had a scotch and water at night. He is going to watch what he eats but he thinks this is too extreme. Thing is, you can eat all you want, as long as what you are eating is vegetables. Therefore, you really shouldn’t be hungry. But I don’t want to eat vegetables all day long. I. Just. Can’t.

I think what keeps me going is knowing this isn’t permanent. Gradually adding foods back in is fun, and it gives me something to look forward to. I have also acquired (already) more of a taste for veggies and fruit, and I can see making those protein shakes a part of our weekly habit. They’re easy, good, and keep your appetite under control. I did find out yesterday that avocados are on the ‘yes’ list, so I am headed to Whole Foods at lunch to stock up on more sweet potatoes and avocados. Yee-haw!

I bought the book, “You On A Diet”, yesterday. My parents are using this book for their healthier lifestyle transformation. I downloaded some of the recipes and food guide—much, much better than the cleanse. In fact, most of them sounded downright delicious. I think that will be what I transition to after the cleanse. And, alcohol is allowed in moderation. (Whew!) The only problem I foresee with this is that it requires a lot of prep-work and cooking—two things I have little time for—so we’ll see.

Onto other things…….

Yesterday I experienced the biggest transformation I’ve experienced thus far when it comes to anti-aging: microdermabrasion. I still can’t quit touching my face! Even hubby said, “It feels just like the baby’s!” Fine lines – gone. The little frown lines on my forehead—diminished. My skin is super smooth, almost glowing. I am working on a story about non-surgical cosmetic procedures. A client had me try out one of their new microderm machines yesterday—something I had planned on mentioning in my story. I thought I was too young for microdermabrasion. Turns out, I’m not. In fact, it’s better to have treatments now in order to protect and preserve the skin. She showed me the (eww) dead skin that came off during the procedure, and I am a twice-a-day face cleaner and wear minimal make-up. I was shocked. Problem is, this treatment is $80 a pop so I need to think about it some more. Some women get weekly microderms, but most go once a month. Maybe if I went every other month I could justify the cost. The results are so worth it, and I am the biggest skeptic when it comes to anti-aging modalities. Today, I am going to another client who does total facial makeovers using all kinds of cosmeceuticals, make-up, etc. I’m looking forward to, hopefully, learning something new that I can incorporate into my daily routine.

I visited some of my old Spaces pals on MySpace last night. Turns out, you can download some sort of voice messaging for your blog. I don’t know if MSN has it, but if so, I so want it on my blog. It allows you to put a voice to a face. It’s pretty cool. OK, that was random – microderm to blog features.

What else? I am mentally preparing a lit of all of the updates and renovations I want to do to our house this year. Top of the list is the powder bath. The fixtures/décor are original to the house and are in desperate need of an update. Fortunately, hubby agrees. I also want to change out the tile in the master bath. It’s a deathtrap right now—very slick. I want natural stone, like slate or limestone. Of course, that will call for new countertops, too, because what we have now won’t look right. And then I’ll just decide to go for it and change out fixtures, too. The big project is extending the gameroom upstairs. We want to knock out the wall into the attic and take the room back a bit and put in a built-in wall unit for our big screen with lots of bookshelves. I am thinking that this might be a project that requires a home improvement loan, but we’ll see. On a much smaller scale, we found a new lawn guy who can do seasonal flowers for us and more landscaping all for a reasonable price. He’s hired. I want to ask him about doing some landscaping around the pool, too, and maybe even extending our patio out so I can have a nice place for the porch swing I am getting from Papa’s house. But wait…not finished yet. I have also decided I want to stain our cabinets in the kitchen to a deep, dark stain. Then I’ll finally be finished with the kitchen, outside of updating appliances, which may never happen and that’s OK.

That’s it – I think. Except I know that in this year we’ll be transitioning the nursery to more of a big girl room—one of my favorite things. It can wait though, as she is very content as is and so are we. I think we are also going to get a leather sofa for the upstairs gameroom—something that will resist wear/tear and spills. That will lead me to a coffee table, rug, new carpet, etc., I’m sure. At least I’m honest with myself! Sound like enough? Um, yeah.

Hubby and I did such a great job last year saving and investing. We both maxed out our 401K’s at work and contributed to a different account. This year, we plan to really beef up the girls’ college accounts. All I can do is hope and pray that we continue to have good years at work, which also means that we all stay healthy and happy. That’s the priority. We contribute a fair amount to our church this year—I was raised to do that and believe in doing so—but hubby doesn’t agree with the 10 percent tithing. He just doesn’t get it. I do, but there is no way I can convince him otherwise. I always feel guilty, receiving the blessings and not returning them. I mean, we do, but not what is “asked.” We also donate to charities in various ways throughout the year, but I always get a nagging feeling about the “you get what you give” philosophy. I probably worry too much, but still……

There is a class at our church I’d love to take. I think it would be so good for me, personally. However, it’s on Wednesday nights, which are gymnastics nights. Sure hubby could take her, but we both know there is no way he can commit to a weekly schedule like that with his work the way it is. And I don’t want to take the class unless I can fully commit to it. Maybe someday I’ll be in a better position for something like that. Hope so.

Well, clock says it’s time for lunch, and I take eating pretty seriously these days. Pretty much anything sounds appetizing. Oh great, the girl in the cube across from me says, “Do you want chips or fries?” She’s ordering lunch for herself and a friend. Ugh. Oh, and still no news on the ring. The cleaning lady comes today so maybe it will turn up. I need about 4,000 of you to visit my space so I can reach the 100,000 mark! Woo-hoo! I know my writing has been rather ho-hum lately. It’s just that I run out of hours. Tonight’s agenda? Getting out birthday invites for both kids. Working on my online albums. And that’s after swimming lessons. See what I mean? No hours….. alas.

 

Til next time…..

Before I get into Day 3, let me begin with some interesting things I overheard in the lobby of my daughter's dance school tonight. As I was watching my oldest spin across the floor and perfect her plie', I listen in to a conversation between a group of 14 and 15 year old dancers, who, though the months, have scared the living hell out of me simply because they are essentially my future.

 

Here are  a few snippits of their wisdom:

 

Girl 1: So Santa brought you a Juicy bag AND a Juicy necklace? OK, I need to have a talk with Santa. I just got a Juicy bag.

 

Girl 2: OK, so, like, don't be mad but I got a Juicy bag too, like from my Dad.

 

Girl 3 appears: I mean, like, Juicy is nice and everything but it's just going to be a trend. Like, (Girl 4), she got a Coach bag. I mean, no offense to you (Girl 1 and Girl 2), but a Coach will go with everything and for a long time. I mean, it's like a time piece.

 

(Insert inner laughter here..... I wasn't aware a Coach purse could also tell time.)

 

Another Girl: Hey do you guys all realize we are wearing Uggs?

 

Responses all at once: I want the new Uggs, these are from last Christmas, these aren't the ones I asked for, ohmygod they are so comfortable.....

 

Girl 1: So did you get to talk to (some cute boy) during the break?

 

Girl 2: Yeah but he's just so, ugh, ya know?

 

Girl 1: So was it like a hi/bye or a real convo?

 

(Insert me trying to figure out convo......convo....conversation...got it!)

 

Girl 2: I dunno -- like is just talking on the phone about nothing a convo?

 

Girl 1: I guess. Hey (Girl 3), if you're just talking on the phone is like a real convo or just talk, talk?

 

(So there's a difference between conversation and talk? Who knew?"

 

Another girl comes back: All I know is that if had a butt like that (talking about some other girl) I would NOT have Juicy plastered across my bootie.....

 

(To myself, I think....maybe she should have Coach plastered across her ass. Then her butt could tell her that it's time to go to the gym.)

 

 

OK...... now.....

 

Day Three:

 

I didn't go to bed feeling as hungry last night. My friend who has done the cleanse several times let me know a better way to make the shakes that adheres to the cleanse, and it did help with hunger somewhat. Last night, hubby was at his first piano lesson, so I was on my own for dinner (we're doing this together). I didn't feel like steaming a bunch of veggies for one, so I did the Plan B of the diet, which is to eat veggies from a can. I had most of a can of spinach. I know, appetizing, right? For dessert, I had a few berries, followed by a smoothie.

 

This morning, I had another smoothie and some fruit. I met a friend for lunch, and thank goodness we went to a place called Greenz.....salads, obviously. They offered one that fit the bill, as long as I cut the bacon, which I did. It was served with a yummy piece of toasted bread, which I promptly put to the side and under a napkin. My cheat, if you will, was a glass of Diet Coke. Fountain Diet Coke -- the best.

 

For a mid-afternoon snack, I had sliced apples and some green tea. Thrilling, I know. Then for dinner, I was expecting hubby to grill the skewer of veggies and mushrooms I bought while I was at the gym during my daughter's dance class. (They are two doors down from each other.) I walk in -- no comida. WTF? He said he looked at the vegetables and just couldn't stand it anymore. He would rather eat nothing. Fine by me, but I'm not giving up. (And as it turns out, neither is he....yet). I pulled out the steamer and threw in my skewer stuff, asparagus, broccolli, cauliflowe r, carrots, etc. I cooked a sweet potato. And, I fired up the smoothie machine. Dinner is served! I can't imagine doing this for seven more days, but I guess I will. My admission for the day: I felt a little light-headed a few times. I got in a great work out though, and so far, I've done abs and toning every night.

 

This day was completely nuts....I'd try to include the times for everything but it's hard to remember. So I'll be approximate.

 

11:30 last night....I doze off, just starting to get into sleep. I hear the all-too familiar wail from upstairs. Olivia. I try to let it pass. Normally, she'll calm down and go back to sleep. No such luck. My neighbors three doors down could hear this. I worried about Kate waking up on a school night so I head upstairs. We rock a bit, and it appears that she is kind of "sleep walking" -- half asleep/half awake -- not really aware of all that just transpired. I try to put her back in the crib. She wakes up. She wails. It's getting close to 1 a.m. I am desperate at this point so I do the forbidden, and I bring her into the guest room with me so we can sleep. This kid cannot sleep in a regular bed -- she was jumping around and talking. So back in the nursery we go. I rock and sing for a bit longer and put her to bed. She doesn't protest. I get back in bed after 1.

 

Alarm goes off at 6. You can imagine how thrilled I am by this. Somehow, I manage to shower and get my make up on by the time my oldest's alarm goes off. I hear her punch snooze, the little sucker. Go to the kitchen and get her lunch made and make sure all backpacks, etc. are in order. Head upstairs to an incredible protest. She's tired and cold. Her leg hurts. She just can't make it to school. I just dress her while she complains about her tights being uncomfortable, her hair being pulled too hard when I brush, etc.

 

WAIL! There's Olivia....... I run Kate downstairs and get her some breakfast and make sure she has her vitamins. I make a bowl of mixed fruit for hubby's breakfast. I head back upstairs for Olivia. Very unlike her, she doesn't want to get dressed either. It's a tearful struggle. We head downstairs and hubby is slamming his fruit and rushing Kate out of the door. We say our good-byes. Then he tells me that about six of the bottles of wine we have belong to a partner at work, so I helped round those up (wine...i miss you so) all while the baby is crying. Loudly. Because I won't hold her. I can mutli-task but juggling six bottles of wine and a toddler -- not so much. Hubby and Kate head off to school hopefully at the speed of lightning because it's almost time for the bell. I put Liv's shoes on -- SCREAM. Not those shoes. Well hell? Then which shoes, and when did you become old enough to even know which shoes you like and want best? We search around til we find the Chosen Pair. Tears are dried.

 

I run to my bathroom to put on my lipstick, jewelry, and perfume -- oh yeah, I was bringin' sexy back today -- and I realize that something is missing. Where is my new ring? The Tiffany ring hubby got me for Christmas? I look in all of the usual places and I realize I don't even remember taking it off. My mind goes back to a trip to the grocery store this weekend. My hands were cold and it flew off. I got on all fours and my stomach to retrieve from under a display of peaches. My thought was to see if I needed to get it resized, again, just a bit. I didn't. I retraced all of my steps -- out to the mailbox, in and around the car, through the house.....nothing. I coax Liv to go with me with a promise of "outside." She's all smiles. I have a staff meeting at 9, and there's no way I'm going to make it. I am obssessed with this ring. "Later" I tell myself.

 

I scoop up the baby, grab Kate's dance bag for tonight, my gym back for working out, turn off the alarm and head to the garage. WAIL! And then SLAP - right across my cheek and eye. "NO Mommy! OUTSIDE. IWAN OUTSIDE!" I try to tell her we are going outside, but I know she meant she wanted to return to the front yard. I am out of time so I tell her in a very sterm voice that we don't hit and we're leaving. WAIL! Kick. WAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "OLIVIA, STOP IT!"

 

WAILLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!! I try to get her in the carseat -- she bucks like a wild horse....... "NO MOMMY NO!"

 

I am 100 percent positive my neighbor thinks I abuse my kids. How could she not? I manage to wrestle her in the seat, give her some juice and her blanket and get into the driver's side. It's just after 8, and already I feel like I've had a full day. I head to the sitter and retrace my steps there -- no luck. I call Kate's school to let them know that if they find such a ring, please call me. I do the same at work and at Whole Foods, where I went for lunch.

 

Dammit. Just dammit.

 

Drop the baby off and head to work. I am 10 minutes late to the meeting and then realize, there is no meeting today. Nice. On my list of to-do's for the day, in addition to tons of work, purchase birthday gifts for the girls online (don't have time for stores), look around for a vintage Willie Nelson tee-shirt for the concert (never got around to it), get prescription filled by phone (finally got it done after work), make hair appt. (didn't), confirm upcoming medical appts. for the fam (done), find unique party favors for Kate's party (found but too expensive), meet friend for lunch (check), confirm cakes for girls (done), try to get pedicure at favorite spa scheduled for Friday (no luck so far); call another spa where I let my gift certificate expire to ask for an extension (didn't do it -- maybe I should give up on this one); arrange hubby's surprise for March (belated V'day gift....done); go to Tiffany web site to stare at the missing ring (why, I don't know....). SIGH.

 

I realized a forgot a few things this morning - gee, wonder why -- so I leave a bit early to swing by the house before picking up Kate for dance. I search the house once more for the ring -- nada. Head to the school, get Kate.....She requests McDonald's. I tell her this is her only fast food/junk food for two weeks (the twice a month on activity nights rule). She wants to use one of her nights up, so we do. I don't even like McDonald's but it smelled really good in there -- not like lettuce. I had willpower the strength of steel as I simply ordered her meal, and didn't even get iced tea (also not on the cleanse). I made it through watching her eat my favorite fries ever, and we head to dance class where I discover that Kate is now eligible for jazz and hip hop. It's too late in the season to sign her up but we'll start in a summer session. She is delighted. I get her set up in her class and head to the gym. I do 30 minutes of intense cardio while watching Entertainment Tonight. That's the most alone time I've had in weeks, I decide. Pick up Kate and head home.

 

She decides she wants to try out her new puzzle. She and her dad hit the floor to put it together while I cook a gourmet meal of steamed veggies. I realize the maid is coming tomorrow -- and you all know how I have to clean for the maid. So I try to get a smoothie made, steam veggies, clean up, and get the oldest to bed all at once. She begs to finish the puzzle -- I relent, but no stories. Then she announces this: "Tomorrow is college day and we can come to school dressed as what we want to be when we grow up."

 

I know what she's going to say but I secretly hope she doesn't. She does -- a singer.

 

While I'm all  for that and supportive, it really doesn't fit in well with college theme and nor does her chosen outfit -- it's OK, but definitely shows it's not opera she's interested in, but MTV. Oh well, whatever. Pick your battles right? I go upstairs and get the outfit ready and clean her room -- it's faster, what can I say? I get her to bed. I hear Liv coughing--she's sick. I pray she doesn't wake up. She doesn't. I head downstairs to straighten up the downstairs except for the bedroom, where hubby is trying to sleep off what appears to be the same bad cold that Liv has. The hacking on both floors makes this house feel like an infirmiry of sorts. And yes, there she goes again..... I know the crying will start soon, poor thing. And poor mom. I'm tired.

 

I have a dentist appointment at 8, an interview for a story at 10, about 5 important errands to run, Kate's gym class tomorrow evening.......It will start all over. Hopefully, I won't lose anything, but as crazy as my life gets, anything is possible. My goal was to get at least one online photo album done tonight. Didn't do it.........but I did blog. I did cook. I did clean. I got the clothes from the dryer and into the hamper to be folded. Not folded but out of the dryer. I straightened my daughter's room. I got her backpack ready for tomorrow. Oh, and went to the gym and outside of a diet coke, I didn't cheat on my eating plan today. I got some great work done today and feel somewhat ahead. I even ordered girl scout cookies from a co-worker's daughter, even though I know I'm not going to be able to eat them. I signed my daughter up for theatre class.

 

See, told ya this day was crazy.

 

Til next time......

 

 

 

Wow am I thin! Nicole Richie has nothing on me. After one day of dieting, I'm bikini-ready!

 

And, I'm also a (fat) liar.

 

So here's the skinny (he, he...sorry)......

 

On Friday night I decided to make online photo albums for recent digital pictures, our Napa trip being one of the albums. Photo after photo, I realized one thing -- fat. Not obese fat. Not huge fat. Just, well, round.... really round. I am a realist and understand that as I approach my mid- and late-30's, I'll gain some weight due to a slower metabolism. I also know that my body won't ever look like it did when I was in my early 20's because at that point, I had not been pregnant. My hips are always going to be a bit wider now -- that's just how it works. My feet will always be a half-size larger -- also how it works. And, let's face it the droops are part of it, too, unless you leave the delivery room to begin crunches with your trainer, a la Denise Richards.

 

I hate dieting. In fact, I'm against it. If you're dieting, you are on a temporary fix to lose weight, just to gain in back when you go off of the diet. I have been exercising, but in no way am I consistent based on a number of factors. I don't have an unhealthy diet, but I realize that foods I could easily burn off years ago now stick to me--cheese enchiladas, broccoli/rice casserole, macaroni and cheese, pasta, potatoes, etc. What do these foods have in common? Refined grains, carbs -- thie white stuff -- and cheese. I have also grown much, much fonder of wine in the past few years. It's loaded with carbs, calories, and sugar. My precious Diet Cokes are packed with sodium and all kinds of artificial ingredients. My Starbucks habit -- countless empty calories. I took a look at my overall eating habits and realized that my intake, while it's not in excess, just isn't all that healthy.

 

That is what led me to this detox plan. I have based it on one from George DeJohn, www.georgedejohn.net. I am not doing his plan step by step for several reasons, the primary being I don't want to pay $270 for a bunch of supplements. However, I like the idea of it. Here is a breakdown of the 21-day plan:

 

Days 1-10: Only eat fruits and vegetables. You should eat twice as many vegetables as fruit, though. The preferred method is raw vegetables, but you can also steam or sautee them using olive oil. The vegetables can also be seasoned. You can only drink water and green tea. Oh, and you can have one sweet potato per day, if you want. For salad dressing, you can use the Annie's brand (available at Whole Foods) as long as it doesn't have canola oil or dairy products in the ingredients -- such as the red pepper vinaigrette.

 

Days 11-21: Incorporate meat back into your diet -- fish, chicken, and very lean cuts of red meat. However, each serving musn't be more than 5 ounces. A good way to judge is to make sure the serving isn't larger than the palm of your hand. Continue with the fruits and vegetables.

 

After day 21, you should be pretty well "cleaned out" from following this plan. I'm sure you'd be even more "clean" if you took the supplements. You can slowly integrate the following back into your diet--whole grain rice, pasta, and bread (palm size per serving), low-fat dairy, and eggs. Ideally, you eliminate sugar and "whites" totally or eat them very sparingly, like when you go out to eat, parties, etc.

 

Alcohol..... this is a tough one. I can't find a lot about it except that you must eliminate it for the 21 day detox. I guess after that, you should just use your best judgement. I don't drink a lot, anyway, so it's not a huge problem for me. I will probably just go back to drinking socially and having wine at night on the weekends--my typical drinking schedule, lol.

 

This "diet" made sense to me because it isn't a diet -- it's a lifestyle change. If I was to tell myself "OK, no more carbs--ever starting Monday" I would never stick with it. However, the 21 days is a good way to "train" my brain about eating healthy. I've already tried new fruits and vegetables. Hopefully, I'll develop more of a taste for what is good for my health, anyway. I also know I need to drink more water--this will help. Knowing that I can have brown rice, whole wheat pasta, a turkey sandwich on whole grain bread in just a few weeks -- I'm cool with that.

 

This detox also recommends you "sweat" as much as possible. Therefore, I am getting back to my exercise schedule which sort of disappeared during the holidays. I did crunches and toning last night, and I can feel it....which is good.

 

My modifications to this plan are my own, simply because I don't need to lose tons of weight and I wasn't really full of "toxic stuff" anyway. Therefore, for breakfast, I am blending some of this fruit into a smoothie with all approved ingredients except for the fat-free yogurt--that's not approved. But it's just a half-cup, so sue me. Also, I NEED breakfast in the morning--I can't think without it. And in my job, I need to think.... a lot...So I have added a hard-boiled egg (whites only) to the morning routine. Here is a sample of yesterday's menu:

 

Day One:

Breakfast -- Power Smoothie with mixed berries, fat-free yogurt, 2 tsp of whey protein powder, two tsp of peanut butter (weird, I know....), ice cubes. One hard-boiled egg.

 

Lunch -- Big salad full of spring mix lettuce, tomatoes, broccoli, caulifower, squash, zucchini with Annie's dressing. Dessert was mixed berries.

 

Dinner -- Steamed veggies -- broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, mushrooms, squash, zucchini. Half of a sweet potato with a pat of butter. (Butter is OK -- margarine is NOT). Dessert was steamed applies lightly seasoned with cinnamon.

 

Day Two:

Breakfast: Same smoothie and an egg.

 

Lunch: Will go to Whole Foods to make a big salad.

 

Dinner: More steamed veggies.

 

One of the biggest problems with this plan is the cost--eating like this isn't cheap, as produce is can be pretty pricey. Also, the chicken and fish should be fresh-water, free-range, etc., but it's not mandatory. However, when I think of how good these foods are for my body, and the example it sets for my kids, then it's worth it. I know I am going to have two set-backs in this 21 day detox plan -- my kids' birthdays this month. I am definitely going to want a small taste of the cakes I'm having made for them, and at the baby's birthday, I'll have some wine and/or champagne since it's a gathering of friends/family at our house. This afterall, is life, and I plan on living it! Also, my pal Alleycat is having a dinner next week, and I know I won't be able to refuse drinking vino with her.... I mean, that's our thing. I will eat the "unapproved" foods sparingly and enjoy every bite!

 

So am I hungry? A little bit. Yesterday evening I felt hungry, but right now, I'm really not and I only have an hour or so to go before lunch. I will fess up and say that I plan on having ONE Diet Coke per day. I am a busy working mom -- I have to have some sort of vice. But that's it. One. Promise. Oh, and you should have seen me Saturday night. It was like Fat Tuesday at my house. We ordered a large pizza and plowed through two bottles of wine. We watched old cheezy 80s metal videos and I was dancing around like crazy. I knew we'd pull the plug on Sunday so I took advantage of it!

 

I feel pretty proud of myself. I refuse to be among the masses who are "on a diet" and "starting to work out." This is just my lifestyle -- making better choices for this stage of my life. My friend who was on this detox looks so great and she swears she has more energy than ever before--I could use that! It will be nice for a night out at a Mexican food restaurant to be an absolute treat, rather than Tuesday's take out. That's how it should be anyway. And quite honestly, I like the way whole grain foods taste better anyway. I'll keep my daily progress (I hope) posted on this blog. I didn't weigh myself yesterday. I'm pretty sure I know the number. I'll do it today, and then at the end of 21 days to see what happened. My hope is that I will feel better and look better so that I will have the motivation to continue with this lifestyle change. We'll see......

 

Alright then, I'm off to make myself another cup of green tea.......

 

 

While much of the world has been back in the swing of things for a week or more, I've still been "on vacation." I took an extra two days, in addition to the generous week my publisher gives us, in order to stay with my daughter until she returned to school today. My mind was swimming with to-do's last night, so much so, that I couldn't sleep. I went to bed at 11. I tossed and turned. I think I entered a light sleep and then woke up to pounding rain outside around 1 a.m. I got up and went online, had a piece of string cheese, and made a long list of everything I need to get done. I went back to bed, to the sound of a snoring hubby. Damn! Can't a girl catch a break? I guess a drifted off around 4 a.m. Next thing I hear is hubby say, "Are you getting out of bed or what?" The alarm had been going off for almost 30 minutes. I have never slept through an alarm before, until today.

 

Then the rush of school began. My oldest was none too happy to get up and dressed for school. She whined upstairs to downstairs, and then on the way out of the door. She doesn't like the coat I bought her -- too big she says. It's such a nice, cute coat. Every time I try to put it on her, she winds up in tears. I am just going to donate it to charity and then take her to Wal Mart and let her choose a coat. Apparently, she doesn't appreciate it so why bother? Speaking of tearing up, this kid is really going through it. She cries at the drop of a hat! She's almost 6 -- not 12. I don't know what's going on. If her hair isn't right, if I speak too harshly, if the the food on her plate isn't right, if she doesn't get to play what she wants.....bam! Tears! This is so not like her. I'm worried and frustrated at the same time. Then the baby -- wow -- is she ever 2! She has decided that shirts are optional. She refuses to wear one. If I put one on her, she immediately takes it off, screaming all the while. If I try a snap shirt, she takes off her pants, rips off the snaps, and then removes the shirt. I've seen her almost choke herself trying to take off a shirt. Yesterday, she drove all the way from my parents' lakehouse back home without a shirt. I hope this isn't any indication of a future chosen profession........

 

So today is my eight-year anniversary at the magazine. Wow. I haven't even been married eight years. I don't know that I've ever done any one thing for eight years straight. I can still say that I love it. Actually, I love it more than when I started the job, so it really doesn't even feel like eight years of work.

 

On a completely unrelated topic, I learned yesterday that my ex husband got married in early December. Apparently, it was a small affair with close friends and a few family members. Not sure what I think of it yet. I did dream about him last night though -- nothing good, nothing bad -- just a dream. It always happens when someone talks about him or I am in conversation about him. Something is buried way down deep inside my brain, I suppose, when it comes to him. Blech.

 

I feel really good about all that I accomplished over the break -- mucho organization, straightening, and errands. I also saw almost all of my family, which is no small accomplishment. New Year's was fun. We went to dinner and had sushi and a bottle of wine, then we hit two more restaurant bars just for fun. Later, we went to a party in the neighborhood at the home of one of my husband's business prospects. We had a good time. Well, I think we did. I kind of get a little fuzzy about mid-way through several glasses of champagne and chambord. Yum when drinking, ouch the next day. That was a headache! And I had to drive three hours on that headache. When I was at the lake, I visited my grandparents and went through all of their old pictures. I selected some really great ones that I am having copied. I have a "project" of sorts in mind for them. Just looking at those photos makes me realize how fast time flies....... My favorites were of them "dating" while he was on leave in WWII. They were in their swimsuits and looked so cute. The honeymoon pics were great, too. 61 years. Wow.

 

Well, speaking of back to reality, it's calling my name. Time to drop off the baby at the sitter, grab a starbucks, and get to work. On my "to do" list is getting the materials I need for that 21 day detox I am going to start most likely next week. Once I read more about it and get a grocery list going, I'll put up the link to the information. I hear it's really great, and my friend who did this not only lost weight but has gorgeous skin and hair plus a lot more energy. The only thing I dread is giving up diet coke and wine. The wine isn't a permanent change, but is part of the detox. Because I am not an overweight person, I know that I will eventually incorporate diet coke back into my daily intake. I will just try to reduce it to one can per day. I think that should be alright. Hell, a girl's gotta have somethin' right?

 

Til next time......